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Groans, No Words

“Give ear to my words, O Lord; consider my groaning. Give attention to the sound of my cry, my King and my God, for to you do I pray.” (Psalm 5:1-2)

“Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit intercedes for us with groaning too deep for words.” (Romans 8:26)

“Jesus Wept.” (John 11:35)

Today I have only groans in my prayers, no words. Even on the world wide web I can’t find a prayer with the words to capture the complexity and sorrow of my spirit, as I listen to news of beheaded babies and horrified hostages and the senseless slaughter of innocents undertaken by Hamas.

Though I know peace is the answer, and always the goal, just now my spirit is lit up with the need for just violence. I want Hamas to be eradicated. Just being honest. I grieve for the people of Israel and their senseless suffering, and those hostages who are to become human shields for the terrorists. I grieve for the Palestinian Jewish, Christian, and Muslim people, the vast, vast majority who in no way support the violence and death Hamas is perpetrating on their behalf.

I admit on days like this that I find it difficult to hold out hope for the day when swords are turned into plowshares, and lions lie down with lambs. I lament to God, who promises to be present and active in our midst. Come in your power today and save us! Bring your peace and justice, somehow in a way that minimizes more senseless loss of human life. I groan!

I groan for leaders and governments, trying to figure out how to act in such a complex moment, with such a long and complex history.

I groan for soldiers gathered en masse and waiting for orders, and for their loved ones who are worried about them.

I groan for the father I am watching bury his young boy he had dinner with last night.

And I groan for the flourishing of the wicked, ever-threatening the light.

I can do nothing else but groan today. But I groan, indeed, and will do so with faith still, somehow.

God, be with us. Come with power, and save your people.

Peter Hawkinson

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